Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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