and she was petting her beer can
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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