just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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