i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?