If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Acid is not a monday night drug
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
