Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I will be naked everywhere
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
