I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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