Christians are straight up FREAKS
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
nutella sex= disaster
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
