Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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