You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
