Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(240): View more from Maryland

how did your night go?

(336): View more from North Carolina

he asked for my myspace name.

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(646): View more from New York

I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.

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(901): View more from Tennessee

If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.

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(703): View more from Virginia

Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?

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(602): View more from Arizona

i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments

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(904): View more from Florida

I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.

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(425): View more from Washington

I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?

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