Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(813): View more from Florida

Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.

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(813): Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever. http://tfl.nu/e0dp

Replies (33) Good night (5659) Bad night (931)
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(330): View more from Ohio

just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.

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(330): just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this. http://tfl.nu/6gzz

Replies (10) Good night (5991) Bad night (1014)
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(516): View more from New York

Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.

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(516): Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand. http://tfl.nu/xjsp

Replies (7) Good night (967) Bad night (3746)
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(303): View more from Colorado

My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted

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(303): My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted http://tfl.nu/ipi0

Replies (8) Good night (4085) Bad night (1079)
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(519): View more from Ontario

He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.

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(519): He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka. http://tfl.nu/8f21

Replies (13) Good night (2580) Bad night (837)
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(818): View more from California

I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.

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(818): I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha. http://tfl.nu/8wtq

Replies (13) Good night (3476) Bad night (874)
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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.

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(484): omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers. http://tfl.nu/h63v

Replies (17) Good night (1087) Bad night (2472)
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(712): View more from Iowa

I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"

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(712): I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it" http://tfl.nu/ijmk

Replies (19) Good night (2667) Bad night (666)
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(740): View more from Ohio

do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.

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(740): do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment. http://tfl.nu/04bg

Replies (12) Good night (2389) Bad night (1207)
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(760): View more from California

I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart

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(760): I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart http://tfl.nu/0amr

Replies (7) Good night (1040) Bad night (528)
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(303): View more from Colorado

Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.

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(303): Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish. http://tfl.nu/hxa3

Replies (3) Good night (1136) Bad night (441)
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(858): View more from California

PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.

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(858): PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS. http://tfl.nu/mje4

Replies (0) Good night (1754) Bad night (378)
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(949): View more from California

Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.

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(949): Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows. http://tfl.nu/xhmr

Replies (2) Good night (492) Bad night (434)
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(425): View more from Washington

Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs

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(425): Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs http://tfl.nu/z4yh

Replies (1) Good night (543) Bad night (260)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list

(856): View more from New Jersey

"Only you can prevent yeast infections."

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(609): Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list (856): "Only you can prevent yeast infections." http://tfl.nu/zmgo

Replies (4) Good night (531) Bad night (199)

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