Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize