I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
