i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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