Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
