I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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