operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
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