Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
