and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize