so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
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