I saw his package. It spoke to me.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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