We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
