Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Randomize
