my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
As shirtless as possible
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
