Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
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