What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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