I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
This house was built for laser tag.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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