honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize
