He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
if i died would you start the facebook group?
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Randomize
