Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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