I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"