The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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