Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
