Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Randomize
