he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
