He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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