question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
