Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize