I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
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My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
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This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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