But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Randomize