Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
