am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
