apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
