Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
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He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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