I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
We have started to decorate penises.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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