Just mADE A PArabola og urine
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Randomize