So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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