and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
