I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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