My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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